The Joys of Much Too Much: Go for the Big Life--The Great Career, The Perfect Guy, and Everything Else You've Ever Wanted

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9780743238366: The Joys of Much Too Much: Go for the Big Life--The Great Career, The Perfect Guy, and Everything Else You've Ever Wanted

A manifesto for the woman who wants it all
written by a woman who already has it all


Magazine mogul and mother of four, Bonnie Fuller has led some of America's most popular magazines to record successes while also enjoying a fulfilling family life. In The Joys of Much Too Much, Fuller tells women how they too can have everything -- and provides a blueprint for finding the right job, the man of their dreams, and for starting a family -- plus explains how to juggle it all at once. She also gives helpful, unconventional advice for enjoying a packed-to-the-max life:

  • Banish perfection guilt


  • Take every shortcut


  • Experience the positive aspects of denial and envy


  • Above all, never face the facts


A straight-shooting, inspiring how-to, illustrated with entertaining anecdotes from Fuller's personal and professional lives, The Joys of Much Too Much shows women of all ages how to make multitasking a way of life -- and a surefire way to lifelong happiness.

Les informations fournies dans la section « Synopsis » peuvent faire référence à une autre édition de ce titre.

About the Author :

Bonnie Fuller is the editorial director at American Media where she oversees a galaxy of magazines, including America's #1 celebrity newsweekly, Star. She's been a winner twice of the prestigious Advertising Age Editor of the Year Awa

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved. :

Introduction

When I approach a newsstand, I take stock: after all, I work in the magazine business. The headlines and images that catch my eye on any given day range from the latest celebrity wedding to the newest twist on achieving sexual satisfaction. Sometimes I see an article on someone I admire; I'll stop short to look more closely at a photo of a gorgeous dress, or perhaps I'll pick up a tip-filled, helpful piece for a busy mother.

What doesn't work for me -- a mother of four, a wife, the editorial director of American Media, which owns over twenty publications, some of them magazines like Star that have to go to press every single Monday night -- are the immaculate, very sparse white covers of some of the newest entries in the magazine field. These are the ones that tell you how to simplify your life.

If only I had time to clean my closets regularly; rotate my wardrobe on a sensible, seasonable basis; cook healthy, organically proper meals every evening for my family; and keep my home and desktop clutter-free.

Even if I had the time, these things would not be my top priorities. I'd rather ride bikes with my kids or crack open a good book. That's much more fun and satisfying than fixating on the forms of perfection shown in the pages of these magazines.

They reflect my idea of a total fantasy realm -- and not one that I want to fall into headlong. The world I see pictured in these precisely calibrated, full-color spreads could not be more unreal. This is a world in which no one eats fast food on the run or tries to butt in line at the supermarket checkout because the kids are screaming to get out of there. This is a world in which women can actually talk to their friends on the phone without howling, laughing kids or husbands wreaking havoc in the background. This is also a world, I've noticed, where people have few possessions. They own only three pairs of perfect shoes; read few books, newspapers, or magazines; and apparently open the mail and sort through it every day religiously.

After years of trying to make a living at something I love while raising a family, I've come to the conclusion that a jam-packed, maxed-out, full-to-the-very-top existence is the secret to an insanely happy life, no matter what those odes to "simplicity" say to the contrary.

I've pretty much written off the possibility of ever having peace and quiet in my life.

I guess that somewhere along the line I made the decision that I'd rather lead a life that's a blur than one that's a bore.

I'm not the only woman in America who feels this way. Finding the fun -- the joy, the vitality, and the spontaneity -- in an overcommitted life that sometimes seems to lurch from one crisis to another is simply a matter of seeing the beauty in all that we cannot really change, even if we're hell-bent on doing so.

The Power in Wanting -- and Achieving -- More!

In this book, I will share my tips on how to have it all: the career, the kids, the love, and the romance. I intend to show you your life from this new angle, from which you can see that all the things that you think are overwhelming you are in fact a rich, rewarding, and demanding combination of blessings. Even if you've barely ticked off a single thing from your to-do list today, I promise that you will feel good and happy about yourself when you see things my way.

I don't buy the widely accepted belief that women fail when they try to do too much, that they should step back and pare down and focus on the so-called little things, like how to scrub a sink until it sparkles or how to organize the sock drawer to perfection. I can assure you that there isn't one organized sock drawer in my entire house, and I don't give a damn!

Luckily there's no size six body, or genius IQ, or celebrity connections required to live to the fullest. All you need is a positive, can-do attitude and a refusal to drive yourself crazy by letting other people define how you should live your life.

I'm going to show you how to make a road map just for you.

For Every Time There Is a Season: You Can Have It All, but Not All at Once

For the time being, I've given up sitting in the park with just a book, gardening for hours, and other such contemplative pursuits, for the joys of having and raising children while building a successful career. Truth is, I've given up a lot of sleep, too. But I'd rather be with my kids now -- while they still want to spend time with me -- because soon, like all teenagers, they won't. And I've worked hard to get where I am in the magazine industry. Why stop now? I'll have time later to plant irises.

If, God forbid, anything happens to me tomorrow, I don't think I'll be lying there on my deathbed thinking, "I wish I'd gone on more meditation weekends." I will not lie there and regret that I didn't have more time for me. Life is all about choices and priorities.

A noninvolving work life and placid home life will empty your energy reserves faster than any sixty-hour week at the office. We all dream of spending endless days lying on a beach, taking off three months in the summer, or quitting work to redecorate the house. In reality we'd grow bored, not to mention soft around the edges.

Simplifying down to the most precious objects and actions will result in sterility, which is the road to spiritual ruin and mental rigor mortis! I believe in cutting out negative things and people, but why would you want to cut down on stimuli?

I drive my mother nuts because she says that if I have a minute, I'll squeeze five things into it. I always have way too much to do; she thinks that's bad. Yes, sometimes things seem overwhelming, but right now I want to squeeze five things into every spare minute. You hope not necessarily for one great moment of victory but for small achievements that add up to a wonderful and fulfilling life.

Ryan Kwanten, one of the stars in the hit show Summerland, once talked about how since the age of fifteen -- and he's now twenty-seven -- he hasn't spent more than four weeks out of work.

"It's been an incredible ride," he says in the article in Star, the celebrity newsweekly I oversee.

When the interviewer asks him if he's exhausted, he answers, "Sleeping isn't really a priority in my life -- there are so many other things to do. I can catch up with sleep when I retire." I agree.

Plunge into Living!

I'm not the kind of person who yearns to go to an ashram for a week. I think you learn about yourself through experiences -- as many of them as you can manage. When you go through the stages of life -- when you commit to a relationship, when you have children, when you relate to your friends or work colleagues -- that's when you learn about yourself. Few "aha" moments come from sitting in an empty room gazing at your navel.

Most important, I think you gain empathy through experience. One of the reasons I believe I've been successful as a magazine editor is that I can empathize with my readers. Like them, I've agonized. I've been ecstatic, frantic, terrified, lost, exhausted. I know how others feel when they experience those things. I'm lucky, because it's helped make me a richer person.

Don't Play It Safe!

One of the reasons women want life to be "simple" is that the world can indeed be a frightening place: if the focus of your life is avoiding risk, there's little to give you any anxiety, of course. There is also little to excite you. It's like living in some tiny, enclosed space instead of the big, wide, welcoming, sometimes terrifying world out there.

The Chinese once bound women's feet to keep them from getting out into the world -- to hobble them. Sometimes I feel there's been a philosophical return to that kind of thinking. Women are hobbling themselves by believing that if they can't do something while being incredibly "nice," or doing it perfectly, or being with the right man, then they shouldn't do it at all. I say, don't wait to enjoy your life fully, whether that means feathering your nest without Mr. Right or setting out on a group trek of the Himalayas.

Stay proactive in all things. Even if the perfect man isn't in your sights, commit to the apartment or the house.

Decorate.

Take fabulous vacations, or go to parties on your own.

Move cross-country, or to Paris.

Adopt a child.

Live your life as fully as possible -- now. The time clock of life keeps ticking, and we only have one life to fit it all in. There are no second chances, so go for it now.

Learn to enjoy the action that surrounds you every day.

Join me on a search not for the perfectly ordered existence but for the one that makes you happy with its blissful noise. "Keeping it simple" is an impossible task, like rolling a huge boulder up a steep hill, over and over again. Life is a risky, messy business -- but a rich one.

Believe me, there is no better recipe for happiness and inner peace than a perpetually jam-packed-to-the-gills life that suits you. Who has time for self-doubt, self-punishment, and self-admonition when you've got too many interesting and loving demands on your time?

Having more also means you'll be giving more: to your family, to your spouse or lover, to your colleagues at work and your other friends and close associates.

More means being generous with yourself as much as you can be, and making others feel good, too. Having a full life will enable you to grow tremendously as a person, and will contribute to a sense of self-satisfaction and a lasting happiness that no short-fix solution like a "spiritual fast" or a session in a psychiatrist's office can ever match.

Copyright © 2006 by Bonnie Fuller

Chapter One: Never Face the Facts: The Positive Aspects of Denial

a few years ago when I was having lunch with David Brown, the Oscar-winning prod...

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Description du livre SIMON SCHUSTER, United States, 2007. Paperback. État : New. Reprint. Language: English . Brand New Book ***** Print on Demand *****.A manifesto for the woman who wants it all written by a woman who already has it all Magazine mogul and mother of four, Bonnie Fuller has led some of America s most popular magazines to record successes while also enjoying a fulfilling family life. In The Joys of Much Too Much, Fuller tells women how they too can have everything -- and provides a blueprint for finding the right job, the man of their dreams, and for starting a family -- plus explains how to juggle it all at once. She also gives helpful, unconventional advice for enjoying a packed-to-the-max life: Banish perfection guilt Take every shortcut Experience the positive aspects of denial and envy Above all, never face the facts A straight-shooting, inspiring how-to, illustrated with entertaining anecdotes from Fuller s personal and professional lives, The Joys of Much Too Much shows women of all ages how to make multitasking a way of life -- and a surefire way to lifelong happiness. N° de réf. du libraire AAV9780743238366

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Description du livre SIMON SCHUSTER, United States, 2007. Paperback. État : New. Reprint. Language: English . Brand New Book ***** Print on Demand *****. A manifesto for the woman who wants it all written by a woman who already has it all Magazine mogul and mother of four, Bonnie Fuller has led some of America s most popular magazines to record successes while also enjoying a fulfilling family life. In The Joys of Much Too Much, Fuller tells women how they too can have everything -- and provides a blueprint for finding the right job, the man of their dreams, and for starting a family -- plus explains how to juggle it all at once. She also gives helpful, unconventional advice for enjoying a packed-to-the-max life: Banish perfection guilt Take every shortcut Experience the positive aspects of denial and envy Above all, never face the facts A straight-shooting, inspiring how-to, illustrated with entertaining anecdotes from Fuller s personal and professional lives, The Joys of Much Too Much shows women of all ages how to make multitasking a way of life -- and a surefire way to lifelong happiness. N° de réf. du libraire AAV9780743238366

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