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The Lo-Down Lauren Lo Bosworth, the witty confidante from MTV's "The Hills," dishes dating do's and don'ts in this behind-the-scenes look at love and lies. Full description
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DATING MISTAKES AND RELATIONSHIP PITFALLS
I LIKE TO LISTEN TO THE POSTAL SERVICE’S SONG “SUCH GREAT Heights” when I think about happy people in relationships. When Ben Gibbard sings that people are “corresponding shapes like puzzle pieces from the clay,” I picture how nicely a boy and a girl fit together when they hug. Her arms fit snugly under his, both pairs entwined around their bodies, her head cozying up right under his neck. People really do fit together like puzzle pieces.
Imagine yourself as a piece of this love puzzle. Pretend you are the left bottom corner, with two straight edges and one sort of wiggly side. Only one other piece joins up perfectly with your own. As an experienced puzzle solver, you know that it’s just a matter of finding this mysterious missing piece, the one piece that fits just right, in order to complete your relationship puzzle.
We’ll get to the part about finding this elusive matching piece, but for now let’s focus on all of these mismatched ones and all the stuff that comes along with trying to pair up with them.
Now, when you put together a real puzzle, would you ever rip off a little section of your own piece just so that it would fit up against another? No way! You may be frustrated that you haven’t found the corresponding shape yet, but you would never go so far as to mutilate your own piece of colored cardboard for another piece’s benefit. Besides, your mom would probably yell at you for mangling her puzzle of the American flag or a Monet painting or whatever.
So, no. You wouldn’t ruin your own piece just to complete the puzzle. That’s crazy. So why, then, are you so willing to rip up your piece when it comes to your real life, your love life? Don’t say you haven’t done it. Every girl has torn her piece to shreds for the “perfect” guy. I’ve done it, and more than once.
I’ll explain further. Sometimes you rip up your piece to match another in order to feel those initial moments of relationship bliss, hoping that in the long run your mismatched pieces don’t feel too smushed together. Be cautious, my lovely friend. They soon will go from smushed to suffocating, no doubt about it.
Take an ex-fling of mine, for example. He was a rock-’n’-roller, and I’m very musically challenged. I started listening to weird music and wearing studded bracelets to try to fit in with him. Not exactly moi. Let’s just say it ended quickly, and apart from my return to stone-encrusted jewelry, it left me feeling down in the dumps.
So, aside from the inevitable messy breakup, what’s the problem with mismatched puzzle pieces? When you change yourself in order to create a comfortable, fitting relationship for him, it’s bound to fail from day one. Why? First and foremost, you are compromising who you really are for another person. Am I really a punk-rock-listening, studded-bracelet-wearing groupie? Absolutely not! Changing for someone else only discredits the incredible person you already are, and you should never allow anyone, especially you, to treat you with disrespect.
Second, when you’re not yourself, you’re bound to feel unhappy. Finally—and this is a no-brainer—no real relationship is able to survive on the aforementioned unhappiness and fakery, the results of self-compromise.
And anyway, why do you want a relationship with a guy who wants you to change? He’s a shortsighted loser! Hello, you’re awesome just as you are, and you deserve someone who appreciates that huge and important fact.
You’re young, beautiful, classy, and smart. You have a good head on your shoulders and big dreams. Believing in the qualities you already possess and the person you already are is what is going to land you your perfect match. Why? Because guys respect and love women who love and appreciate themselves for who they really are.
Now, don’t freak out when I say this: There are guaranteed to be some bumps along the way in your quest for the perfect boyfriend. Whatever you do, though, believe in yourself. It will change your love life forever, and for the better. If you fail to believe, well, trust me, all you’ll end up with is a broken heart. You’ll hurt yourself and allow others to hurt you. And I can’t have any of my girls feeling down in the dumps. It’s not a good look for you, just like blue nail polish, even OPI Russian Navy.
Now that I’ve explained why it’s an excellent idea to have faith in your awesome self, let’s get back to the bumps in the road. There will always be bumps in the relationship road! Until you find the guy, all your previous relationships really are just more and more bumps. The upside? You are guaranteed to learn more about why your puzzle piece is shaped the way it is and about the kind of person you need to find in order to create that perfect match.
QUIZ: DATING HISTORY
Before we really break into dating mistakes and relationship pitfalls, it’s time for a quiz. This quiz is not here to give you the same side-eye that your teacher does when you’re late to class. Its only function is to help you and me determine how much relationship experience you already have and what kind of experience it is. You could be choosing the wrong guys and just need some honest advice from a friend (me!!) to open up your pretty eyes to all the nice ones out there. Please choose one answer per question and answer honestly. If you don’t, the work we’re doing won’t help you snag a sweetie for yourself.
“The Lo-Down stands apart because of its positive message. Take it from me, Lo’s insight into relationships feels like advice from a girlfriend.”
--Lauren Conrad, bestselling author of L.A. CANDY
Bosworth--late of Laguna Beach and The Hills, two MTV series that showcased the lives and loves of Southern California’s young and glamorous--is building a brand for herself: the sensible-yet-sexy older cousin. This book, which shares a title with her recently launched lifestyle website, expands on the romance-advice section of her site and ably offers an appealing mix of generic and specific relationship advice in a breezy, knowing tone. - KIRKUS, December 1, 2010
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Description du livre Simon & Schuster Children's Publishing 1/11/2011, 2011. Paperback or Softback. Etat : New. The Lo-Down. Book. N° de réf. du vendeur BBS-9781442412002
Description du livre Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers, 2011. Paperback. Etat : New. New item. May have light shelf wear. N° de réf. du vendeur BK0120460
Description du livre Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers. PAPERBACK. Etat : New. 1442412003 Ships promptly. N° de réf. du vendeur Z1442412003ZN
Description du livre Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers. PAPERBACK. Etat : New. 1442412003 Never Read-may have light shelf wear-publishers mark- Good Copy- I ship FAST with FREE tracking!!. N° de réf. du vendeur SKU000028775
Description du livre 2011. PAP. Etat : New. New Book. Shipped from US within 10 to 14 business days. Established seller since 2000. N° de réf. du vendeur VS-9781442412002
Description du livre Simon and Schuster. Etat : New. Brand New. N° de réf. du vendeur 1442412003
Description du livre Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers. PAPERBACK. Etat : New. 1442412003 New! Unread publisher overstock copy. N° de réf. du vendeur Z1442412003ZN
Description du livre Simon Schuster Children s Publishing, United States, 2011. Undefined. Etat : New. Original.. Language: English . Brand New Book. Reality TV personality Lauren Lo Bosworth has witnessed her fair share of bad dating and has experienced some herself. As a star on two reality shows, she is no stranger to drama and what comes along with it. Now she is offering her advice gleaned from her and her famous friends relationship experiences on dating and love. Featuring personal photos and anecdotes about her experiences on Laguna Beach and The Hills, The Lo-Down is a further glimpse into the lives of the people that have enthralled so many. N° de réf. du vendeur BZV9781442412002
Description du livre Simon Schuster Children s Publishing, United States, 2011. Undefined. Etat : New. Original.. Language: English . This book usually ship within 10-15 business days and we will endeavor to dispatch orders quicker than this where possible. Brand New Book. Reality TV personality Lauren Lo Bosworth has witnessed her fair share of bad dating and has experienced some herself. As a star on two reality shows, she is no stranger to drama and what comes along with it. Now she is offering her advice gleaned from her and her famous friends relationship experiences on dating and love. Featuring personal photos and anecdotes about her experiences on Laguna Beach and The Hills, The Lo-Down is a further glimpse into the lives of the people that have enthralled so many. N° de réf. du vendeur BZV9781442412002
Description du livre Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers. PAPERBACK. Etat : New. 1442412003 *BRAND NEW* Ships Same Day or Next!. N° de réf. du vendeur NATARAJB1FI788011