The Dish: On Eating Healthy and Being Fabulous!

Book by ONeil Carolyn Webb Densie

The Dish


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The Dish on Your Diet

Welcome to the club, girl! You’re about to become one of us now—that elite but growing group of smart, stylish women who have learned that the more you know, the more you can eat. That fact has been, up to now, a well-kept secret. But we see no reason to keep it that way any longer. You may have seen others who wine and dine while staying fit and trim and wondered, “How do they do it!” Well, we would like to answer that question for you. Because once the truth is revealed, it will set you free. Free to be a healthier, happier, more sane and more satisfied you. And, oh yes, there’s that little matter of your weight. By following our advice, you’ll be able to control your weight with less of the confusion, punishment, and emotional drama that usually go hand-in-hand with traditional “dieting.” This is the real deal. There’s no magic formula here, only the magic that lies in telling the truth. And the truth about eating is simpler and easier than you think. But more about that later.

Before we fill you in on the details about what you need to know so you can eat more, we’d like you to put yourself to the test. Take our Dish Diet Quiz to help you pinpoint the weakest links in your soon-to-be new way of looking at food. (No matter how committed you may be, we all have buttons that, once pushed, are hard to turn off.) We want you to be brutally honest with yourself. What sets off your irreversible eating launch sequence—emotions, circumstances, habit? What are your typical triggers—10 A.M. coffee break, after-work drinks, dates, no dates, late-night TV? There are no right or wrong answers, only revealing ones. So we’ll hold your hand while you take an honest look at your lifestyle, too. Does your job require a lot of business travel? Do you eat out more than four times a week? Are you super social and love to get together with friends for parties, cook-outs, or any excuse to eat, drink, and be merry? Or maybe you’re the type that favors dressing down in your most worn-out pair of sweats and throwing open the fridge door, as you pounce on the quickest bites to satisfy your raging hunger? Who are you? What are your food likes and dislikes? What makes you salivate? What makes you gag?

Once you’ve identified your individual problem times and situations, and can pinpoint what it is that makes you overeat (or do without), they become easier to deal with. And most important, you need to realize that with the freedom to eat more, comes responsibility. Are you ready for that? The Dish doesn’t mean you can have a splurge-fest on fudge, chocolate chip scones, and croissants. But it does mean you can enjoy all of those foods and other favorites if you just give your meals some forethought (at least as much time as you give to what you’re going to wear every day!). It means that you are ready to take full control of yourself and what you eat—eating more of the foods that make you strong, healthy, and full of energy, and less of those that do little but carry an excessive calorie load. By answering the questions in our quiz, you’ll know if you have what it takes to succeed at The Dish. The key here is self-examination. Have fun with it. Take your time, think before you answer, and be as honest as you can be. (It’s just us; come on, whisper it in our ear.) Then check out the Dish Divas’ Diagnosis for your answer and find out where to turn to in the book for the Dish on your issues. There, you’ll find simple solutions on how you can take control and make a big difference in your diet. Remember, you can be healthy without forfeiting taste or style. This is your first step toward making lifestyle changes tailored to you and your life. The more you know, the more you can eat, and that starts with learning more about you!
The Dish Diet Quiz

Time Triggers

Q: You’ve just dragged yourself in from a long, hard day. No plans tonight. It’s just you and you’re all alone with the contents of your refrigerator. What happens next?

1 You head straight for the kitchen, following the urge to splurge, and man, oh man, everything looks good. You just know how this is going to end.



2 You put on blinders to everything else, and head in the direction of the healthy snacks you’ve stocked in your kitchen cabinets and begin your routine of weighing and measuring every morsel you intend to put in your mouth.

3 You strip and head for the shower, giving yourself time to unwind and relax, then contemplate over a glass of wine which amuse bouche to indulge in before you decide on dinner.

The Dish Divas’ Diagnosis

1 If you find yourself scarfing down whatever’s on hand in the late afternoon or at night, you’re not alone. Even we strong-willed women who make it through the day unscathed can find food cravings in the late-afternoon and evening hours just too much to bear. That wheel of Camembert and leftover baguette that you wouldn’t have dreamed of munching on during the day is like a magnet. One slice is too much, but once you get started, ten aren’t quite enough. Go ahead and blame it on fatigue, fluctuating hormones, depression, a really, really bad day, or just plain old habit. Whatever the cause, identifying and recognizing when you’re most likely to throw caution to the wind and eat whatever tastes good is half the battle. If you know you’re eating too much of the wrong foods, but can’t quite put a finger on when is your weakest time, keep a food journal, jotting down not just what you eat, but what is driving you to eat. (Journaling can be an eye-opening experience—does your journal reveal you’re using food as an emotional rescue? Does it fill a void? And it can zero in on your dietary Achilles’ heel—chips, chocolate, muffins, café latte with whipped cream—in short order.) And as much as possible, clear your cabinets of high-sugar, high-fat munching foods (there’s no reason to tempt fate) and have a cache of healthy foods at the ready.

2 Okay You’re good. Too good. We hate to be the bearer of bad tidings, but there are actually scientific studies that show that people who become obsessive about what they eat, even when it’s all good, are actually more at risk for gaining weight farther down the road. All that steel will has to break sometime and it won’t be pretty.

3 Now you’re talking. Okay, maybe this is an idyllic scene. If you notice, there’s no one else, not even a dog, demanding your undivided attention when you walk in the door. But you get the drift. The idea is to do something to shift your focus from food and find your own way to dissolve some of the day’s tension before you succumb to temptation. What’s that? You say you can’t resist the siren call of the fridge? Hey, even Odysseus found a way to resist the hypnotic call of those sexy temptresses. Okay, so he tied himself to the mast, but you don’t have to go that far. See what works best for you, and stick with it. Just took a shower this morning? What about perusing the latest issue of a celeb rag? Or listen to that new CD (away from the kitchen).

Want more? Check out chapter 4 for The Dish on Eating In and chapter 8 for The Dish on Cheating.
It’s All Relative

Q: Are you cursed with fat genes?

1 Your mom is overweight.

2 Your dad is overweight.

3 You’re overweight.

The Dish Divas’ Diagnosis

All we care about is if you answered (3). Okay. So your hips are wider than you wish (just like Mom) and you wish you were four inches taller (than your mom). And your dad has a real spare tire. But, hey, you didn’t get to pick your parents. You work with the raw materials you’ve got. We can’t all be Jennifer Aniston or Cameron Diaz. You might as well accept your inglorious DNA heritage and take it from there. You can’t change your inherited tendency to put on pounds any more than you can change the color of your eyes. But you can work with and around it. (That’s why colored contact lenses were invented!) Don’t be fatalistic. Your family tendency doesn’t have to be your genetic fate. Your smarts, diet, and lifestyle can overcome any passed-on predilection you have to hang on to pounds. Take what you’ve got and create your own style and be proud of it.
Life’s Little Hassles

Q: You’ve just lost your job, been dumped by the love of your life, your dog failed to notice the difference between his favorite spot outside and the rug. Maybe all three in one day. What do you do?

1 You head for the nearest ice cream place for a double dip of super fudge caramel swirl with nuts and whipped cream. Once you’ve finished you feel nauseous and guilty.

2 You quietly plot your revenge.

3 You indulge in a massage, you head for a double-feature of those foreign flicks you’ve been dying to see, you plan a weekend trip to your best friend’s for a heavy dose of talk therapy.

The Dish Divas’ Diagnosis



1 Well, you did have a really bad day. And splurging like this, while not great, isn’t the end of the world. So you fell off the wagon. No big deal. Just pick yourself up, brush off your new snappy, strappy stilettos, and start again. Stop mentally flogging yourself for your ice cream indulgence. A little oral gratification won’t hurt (as long as your life isn’t a series of life-altering disasters). If you experience a temporary slump because you feel guilty (and nauseous) because you overate, and anxious (and nauseous) over the big, fat consequences, keep telling yourself, “This too shall pass.” And it will.

2 Revenge is indeed sweet and best of all, it’s calorie-free. But forgive poor Fido. He was having a bad day, just like you.

3 If you have the means and the opportunity for any of the above, go for it. These solutions might sound a little too perfect to be true, but the point is, find what works for you. Consider any and all options that won’t add any more to your calorie load.
Is TV Your Trigger?

Q: You’ve planted yourself in front of the tube for an evening of vegetation. (Whatever your secret pleasure, the latest reality TV series, old Joan Crawford flicks, or vintage Japanese sci-fi—to each her own.) What happens next?

1 TV, for you, is fattening. Every time a commercial comes on, you’re up and in the kitchen, scrounging for something to eat. The food commercials are the worst.

2 You bring a limited amount of pretzels or popcorn to the sofa and indulge your craving for salty snacks, while you indulge in your craving for trash TV. You’re so thirsty by the time the next commercial comes on, you quench your thirst with a cola (you keep a stash on hand for emergencies).

3 When you watch TV, you only watch TV. And when the commercials come on, you find something else to do. When you feel your stomach rumbling, you head for the kitchen and pick from all the healthy stuff you have to choose from.

The Dish Divas’ Diagnosis

1 Watching food commercials is like watching gorgeous men and women seducing each other on screen. You can’t watch all that smooching and heavy breathing without thinking about, well, you know. Okay, maybe you don’t bring the box of cookies to the sofa for some serious munching, but when the ads for KFC come on, you’re a goner. And the fridge is just a few steps away. What to do? Hit the mute button and use the few minutes of back-to-back ads to do something else—anything else. Pick up that magazine or book and read a couple of pages, finish making that “to-do” list for tomorrow’s dinner, or paint your nails. Better yet, do some sit-ups or jumping jacks. Just get the focus off the tube and on to something nonfood related until your show comes back on.

2 Number one: Toss the sodas or at least switch to the diet version. Better yet, how about keeping lemon-flavored seltzers, bottled water, or peach-flavored iced tea in the fridge? Or make this one of your planned snacks and get in another serving of fruit—a six-ounce glass of nutrient-packed grapefruit juice over ice. (Carolyn Says: Make mine pink!)

Number two: You shouldn’t be eating in front of the tube, anyway. That’s a basic lesson in Healthy Eating 101! When you’re lost in the story, someone could put doggie treats in your bowl and it probably wouldn’t slow you down. But at least you got one thing right; you’re better off with a bag of popcorn or pretzels than with a quart of Häagen-Dazs and a spoon! If you really must eat, try a handful of nuts (keep them in the kitchen, so you at least have to get up to go get them), or some appealingly sliced up fruits and veggies with a yogurt dip.

3 We’re speechless. ’Nuf said. You’ve got the situation under control (if you’re telling the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but).
What’s for Dessert?

Q: You’ve just finished a fabulous meal at one of your favorite restaurants in town, but you really, really need something sweet to top the whole thing off. What do you do?

1 You throw caution to the wind and decide to go all the way, ordering the most decadent thing you can find. (Fried Mars Bar, anyone?—yes, it’s a real menu item at a little eatery on New York’s Lower East Side.)

2 You fight the feeling, watching everyone else ordering from the dessert tray. You feel tortured but superior, sipping on your hot water with lemon.

3 You share a luscious passion-fruit tart with a fellow diner, catering to that sweet craving, and walk away feeling satisfied but not stuffed.

The Dish Divas’ Diagnosis

1 Could it be any worse? Well, yes, but it’s still a setback. If you’re going to indulge in possibly the most decadent dessert on the planet, you could at least split it two, or better yet, three ways, to minimize the damage. The next time, avoid restaurants that offer such “delicacies” as Fried Mars Bars and you’ve already won half the battle.

2 Self-sacrifice taken to the extreme almost always comes back and bites you in the butt. It’s okay once in a while to feel like you’re in control and superior, but try not to let your swollen head stretch your halo. It could come crashing down on you. Might be a better idea to at least sample that dessert—the one that’s making you salivate like Pavlov’s dog.

3 You may have found the best of both worlds—a serving of self-indulgence, seasoned with a dash of self-control. But better make sure that crust isn’t drenched in butter or that cream isn’t a part of the filling (no wonder it tasted so good). It’s best to ask the chef what goes into those dishy desserts, since it’s easy to be deceived. And try to order smart—fruit instead of chocolate, sorbet instead of ice cream.

Want more? Check out chapter 5 for The Dish on Eating Out.
Name That Craving

Q: You’re standing in your kitchen looking for something to eat. This is your third round of checking out the contents of your pantry, the freezer, then the fridge. You know you want something, but what? Does that leftover salad sound good? What about an orange? Maybe a few slices of ...